“These are your own natural curves that are still there when your clothes come off.”

Turning off the television.

Lindsay Robertson at Videogum brings extremely important news: Greg Pheasant, the sometimes-loveable, mostly-hateable inexplicably scab-faced, dirt-biking chicken-decapitating teen bully from last fall’s controversial Kid Nation, got a haircut (!!), and now he’s looking to make some extra scratch by selling his greasy locks on eBay to fund a trip to Australia. From the looks of his obsessively repetitive MySpace comments, there will be fierce competition. Maybe he could turn this into a side business like Jared’s souvenir Bonanza necklaces.

Either way, I’m glad to see Greg is still making himself relevant! I don’t know why there wasn’t more sustained hype around this show. Despite the Double Dare challenges, it was a cute and sincere portrait of Gen-Y middle America (there were noticeably few city folk).

And the drama! Who wants to watch the boring Hills when there are 12-year-olds running from dust storms and burning themselves with hot oil? CBS could probably charge another batch of kids for the New Mexico faux ghost town ‘Nation experience as a summer camp; I assume that would get them around at least some child labor laws…

Anyway. I agree with Lindsay: I’d love to see where these kids end up in a few years with some reunion specials. (I’m pessimistically assuming that is as close as we’ll get to a Jared Nation spin-off.)